My Humps

I love the song My Humps by Black Eyed Peas, and now it just won some award on MTV. Go Fergie!!

Micro kicks boot-ay!

Today was my first real PE class, followed by my first Microbiology Lab. For PE I had to dress out in the standard NCSU PE uniform (red shorts and NCSU t-shirt)and then report to basketball court three for some fitness pre-testing. The end result was that I have now confirmed how out of shape I already knew I was. And I had to walk around campus in shorts, a very new and hopefully singular experience.

After that, I had to get ready for my first Microbiology lab, which had me very intimidated from the get-go. I didn't recognize the TA's name, and I didn't think that I could pronounce it, which normally means that it's foreign person with a limited English vocabulary. And then I looked at everything we had to do today which seemed like a heck of a lot for a first day. When I arrived, I found that the room was this nasty 70's yellow with brown specks cave, with no windows and a ton of old equipment stuffed in there. I sat down in an uncomfortable high chair and faced all of the equipment I would be working with, a solas, that day. I recognized the Petri dishes, the test tubes, and the sealed cotton swab, but what intimidated me the most was the un-lit Bunsen burner directly facing me. Yes, Jessica is afraid of Bunsen burners. Jessica is afraid of fires fueled by natural gases. Jessica is not going to refer to herself in third person anymore. My first introduction to a Bunsen burner was in the 10th grade with the most frightening Chemistry teacher I've ever seen. He would tell us traumatic and dramatic stories about the dangers of Bunsen burners, and then he'd tell us to light ours, which I would manage to do ten minutes later after my hands stopped shaking. Bottom line: I felt small and intimidated.

But that all changed. I learned that my TA was this semi-cute microbiology graduate student from - get this - Puerto Rico! He had that sexy Puerto Rican accent and gorgeous hair. And he was really nice and patient. He told us all about the safety issues and then we commenced the actual activity - learning aseptic technique. We had to pour molten agar into four Petri dishes, set those aside, perform T steaks of e.coli, something else, and then a mixture of both, perform broth cultures with inoculating loops and more e.coli, and then take the four Petri dishes and choose various things to swab them with from around the room. I think I did excellently, but I'll wait to commit to that until after I see my cultures. And the best part was that I overcame (for the most part) my own personal fear of lighting a Bunsen burner. That's not to say that I didn't covertly edge away from every person who turned on the gas valve and then waited forever and a day to light their burners. Actually, the best part is that I felt confident in that lab; I felt like I knew what I was doing and I had fun. Microbiology lab kicks butt!

Not so hilarious tale, part deux

Ok, I've held this one in long enough. If you haven't already read the post below this one (the one about Rodrigo Santoro) and the attached comments, do so now. Good. I'm going to refer to that post as well as several people, whom I will call Callie, Darren, Kim, and Calvin. (My apologies if any of you are offended).

I noticed that I had a comment from "Anonymous" and as I read it, I realized it was from Kim. In it, Kim says that the experience that the fictional Sarah had with her boss about Karl is just like one she had with her boss about Darren. And she said that Darren reminded her of Rodrigo Santoro, and that Rodrigo Santoro was hot - we could agree on that. And then she added an "Eww!" because I was drooling over the guy who reminded her of Darren. Aside from the actual material of the comment, I recall seeing the comment and saying, "Oh, I see Kim has commented." And then I proceeded to tell Callie everything that Kim had said. And then Callie said, "But how do you know it was from Kim?" What did I say back? "Well, I sure as hell hope it wasn't Calvin." Ok, so it's not as funny as it was when it happened, but I had to have something to post about so you could strain your eyes to see since the background doesn't exactly make the writing pop out. Happy reading!

The hilarious tale of the punny slip

Whilst I and Callie were deeply immersed in the wonderful concoction that is Love Actually, we both were literally drooling into our pillows over the Brazilian hottie Rodrigo Santoro. Santoro plays Karl, the enigmatic chief designer that Sarah has been in love with for years and yet believes she'll never be good enough to deserve him. And who wouldn't be in love with him - ¡Díos mio! He is gorgeous! And he's so sweet! As Sarah opens herself up to him, revealing herself at her most vulnerable moment, he leans in and softly says into her eyes that she is beautiful. With tears brimming in our eyes, Callie and I both watched in silence this stirring unfolding of emotions. And then the one prick that destroys the blissful floating bubble. Callie takes a sip of her fizzy water and I say, "Boy, wouldn't I like to see his Brazil nuts." The reaction was immediate. Callie goes red and promptly has to make a dire effort to retain and swallow her sip of fizzy water that was by then burning to be sprayed about the room. My face goes red and I find tears welling up out of profound fountain of mirth kept deep inside of me. Callie manages to swallow and then joins me in laughing hysterically, trying to ask me if I just came up with that off the top of my head. Of course I did! I'm funny like that. Gradually our laughter died down, but the pun will last for ever.

My First Week of School!

Tomorrow will be the terminus of my first week back at school this semester. Ok, so it was only three days, but it takes some effort to get back into the daily grind of things. I'm taking Microbiology (which looks like it's going to be a lot of fun - my professor is great), Philosophy (also going to be a lot of fun - my professor is from the UK, so I'm going to study her accent in addition to developing my love of knowledge), Organic Chemistry II (same excellent professor, same interesting topic), Spanish Literature (interesting, good Professora, but a lot of reading), and Fitness Walking (interesting professor with a lot of walking). I have the first four classes in a row every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and then PE plus either an organic or a microbio lab on Tuesday and Thursday. But the excellent news: I can get up at the same time all week because class starts at the same time all week - 10:15! Tonight I'm going to see V for Vendetta (again) at my school's theater for $1.50 (take that Cinema 6!), and then I'm going to pack to go home tomorrow after I get out of class at 2:20. Mine and Callie's room is completely decked out with posters and pictures - the only bare space is part of the ceiling (I have three more posters to put up there). I celebrated my return to school by buying a few presents for myself - books! Shakepeare's King Lear, Henry V, Othello, A Midsummer Night's Dream, and The Taming of the Shrew. When I finish Jane Eyre, I'll start on those. Don't think I'm crazy - I just like Shakespeare and classic British literature. I also have to read Jane Austen's Persuasion, and then I'll have read all but one of her works - Northanger Abbey - which I still have to buy, but I've read all the others, so go me!

I did quite a bit of reading over the summer: All of the Harry Potter books in reverse order, all of the Chronicles of Narnia in chronological order, The Twelfth Card by Jeffrey Deaver, Deception Point and Digital Fortress, both by Dan Brown, and then some other books that I reread - like Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte. That's a lot of material if you just think about it.

And now I've finished my homework for the day, and I'm off to check on my laundry. Here's wishing you a jolly good day!

Captain Obvious Strikes Again!

As you must already see, I've changed the appearance of this blog. I've devoted it to my all-time favorite actor and the hottest man in the world (to me that is. I acknowledge that you may harbor other opinions on that matter and I can respect them as long as you admit you're stupid and don't know what your talking about). I can't explain my attraction to Sean Bean, but I don't have to - it's an attraction, he's dreamy, what's there to explain? And besides, the appearance of this blog serves another function: embarrassment. Yours, not mine. If you're reading this at work, you'll have to explain why you're looking at that page with all the pictures of that gorgeous man (this will be particularly embarrasing if you are in fact a man). Ok, so it's a weak excuse, but it's worth it when the mere sight of my blog makes me smile.

been week what i've up past to this

I mean...what I've been up to this past week. Let's see:

Kim's Bridal Shower. I had a great time. It took me a while to compile my gift and then put it together, but all in all I think it turned out well. (I selected some pictures, tweaked them on the computer, printed them on photo paper, and framed them). I finally got to meet the much-heard-of Jenny, as well as many more of Kim's friends. I like them quite well, and I especially liked her parents. I shouldn't have waited so long to blog about this because now I don't remember any of the little details. I do remember sitting around at Darren and Kim's waiting for Darren to get off work - which happened around midnight on Friday, ten pm on Saturday, and then he had to go back in on Sunday, but came home before noon. Not to mention that he went back into work at 3:30 am on Saturday morning, and before six am on Sunday. Apparently there are huge problems with India, but I don't really understand them, so I won't say anymore. But the rest of us had fun getting to know each other in Darren's absence. When we girls left the shower, my Mom called my Dad and they chatted for a bit. When Mom got off the phone, she said that the guys had traveled down to the pavilion (where the wedding is going to occur), and then went out for a steak lunch. I couldn't believe that (my Dad's not cheap, but he doesn't normally do things like that). But Mom said it was true, so we took our time heading back home, stopping by Darren's work and dropping off some sustenance (the chocolate cake was sooooo rich and so very good). We stayed for about an hour, in which time I was given a large box with Captain Jack Sparrow's picture printed on the side (yum!) and a fruit-roll-up with William Moseley's picture (the cute kid from Narnia). I think I made out quite well. But when we got back to Darren and Kim's, we found all of the boys ravenously awaiting our arrival so we could all go out to dinner. Apparently Mom didn't hear Dad say that they were joking about the steak lunch and hadn't had anything to eat all day. So we went out to Ruby Tuesdays and had an excellent dinner, just like the excellent dinner we had on Friday, cooked by Kim. We left on Sunday for home, got back around seven, and life resumed as normal.

I now have a semi-extensive resume in recipes that I can prepare: Cajun pork chops, chicken parmesan on a bed of pasta and marinara sauce, pollo relleno (chicken stuffed with a pepper stuffed with cheese), dirty rice, chicken jambalaya, venison curry, foccacia bread, French bread, half wheat/half white dinner rolls, black beans and rice, red beans and rice, ranch pasta salad, blueberry crisp, apple crisp, coconut crème pie, lemon meringue pie (sans meringue), dark chocolate crème pie, and foogies (fig cookies). Ok, so it' s not so terribly extensive, but it was time-consuming and complicated. I also cleaned house quite a bit and mowed the lawn for over five hours every week (not that I'm complaining - I had fun doing so - no one can hear you over the hum of the motor when you sing). In appreciation of all my efforts, my parent's took the family out to dinner at a Mexican restaurant called El Cerro. I had the beef steak in salsa verde - muy bien y muy picante.

And now, I am typing from my room at NC State. I moved in yesterday and now the room is unrecognizable from the institutionalized white walls, fluorescent lighting, and cold tiles. I spent a record of $350.00 on books (less than 500, I can't believe it!). And I have reunited with the best roommate of all time - my friend Callie. We're currently jammin' to a Nelly song (I've never heard it before, but I'm told that it's our theme song this year just like Hips Don't Lie by Shakira was last year, and like My Humps by Black Eye Peas was my song last year). From where I sit now, Johnny Depp is looking at me from two giant posters next to my bed and two smaller notebooks displayed above the pictures. Did I say Johnny? I meant Captain Jack Sparrow, hottest pirate in the world. Johnny is looking at me, though, from a magazine I have displayed on the same wall. And speaking of walls, every surface on the walls in this room is covered with movie posters and pictures. Callie and I worked very hard to put them up. And she and I have matching Captain Jack Sparrow fleece throw blankets - and we love them! That's all for now, classes start on Wednesday, I'll keep you posted.

A Riddle For You...

I wrote a riddle to help Callie discover what her birthday present was before she opened it, and since she now has, I have to share it with everyone. You see, I am very proud of it and I wish to brag and boast of my cleverness. Actually, I just want to see if anyone can guess what it is!

To Callie on her 19th Birthday (or quite a bit later)
The idea for your present,
Fell right into my lap,
Though I’d say it was fate,
And no part of mishap.

My mother was its vessel,
Hither she made her way,
On purpose bent to me,
And this is what she did say:

“Why Jessica, now attend me,
Just look you on that sheet,
And cause your gaze to fall,
On this most noble treat.”

My eyes did sight upon the page,
And such a sigh escaped my lips!
For on the paper, proudly shown,
Stood a figure never once eclipsed.

Now, my mother’s purpose,
As I came to understand,
Was to tease me with the book,
That I held firmly in my hand.

For the thing that thus displayed,
On that shiny, glossy page,
Was a thing that I should want,
Or thus my mother did make wage.

But I in rare noble mind did cry:
“Why that’s the perfect gift!
I’ll send it to my dear good friend,
For her spirits it shall lift.”

And so to you this gift is sent,
I hope it brings you cheer,
And comfort both day and night,
When you can hold it near.

These clues four I leave for you,
To solve before unwrapping.
And if you should succeed,
Consider me happy clapping.

First, while more serious gifts
You may suppose there be,
None will bring such mirth,
As the one you now can see.

Second, whilst away you dream,
This one with pistol cocked shall fight,
To keep you safe and hidden,
From any demons in the night.

Third, if you should wish to cuddle,
Then he shall be your man.
He’ll hold you close in his arms,
And steal as much time as he can.

And fourth, if ever cold you are,
Just find him and be warmed,
For his arms are both wicked hot,
And in your blood, heat shall form.

Have you solved this little puzzle?
Have you solved it, dear friend?
Whether yes or no, open it now,
And thus this poem doth end.

Fun Sans Sun

My best friend Callie was staying in New Bern for a few days, and called me up yesterday to invite me and my sister to the beach. Did I want to go? Hell yes! I had a great time with Callie and her family! When we got to the beach, the waves were perfect! I really wish that I had thought to bring some boogie boards, but what's done is done said the Goblin King, or was it what's said is said? Anyway, I was able to ride the waves up to the shore through some complicated technique of diving infront of a wave at the right moment before it crests and then letting the raw power of the ocean carry me to shore - I really don't understand the mechanism, but it sure was fun! The sun was hidden by a fine layer of stratus clouds, but the lack of impending rain or thunderstorms made that fact a happy occurence. I can't believe how much I missed Callie this summer! We had so much fun just talking and catching up! Callie is my roommate as well, so I'm happy to say that we will be seeing eachother very soon, in less than two weeks when we go back to school. I think I've embarrased Callie enough, so I'll conclude by mentioning that I had a perfect afternoon yesterday and that I've never had so much fun at the beach.

The Chickens Are Out To Get Me!

Yesterday, while my sister was away at a day-camp for Cross Country, I took it upon myself to perform her daily chore of feeding the chickens. I scooped out a bucket of scratch corn and scattered it out for the chickens. Then I looked inside the house - the layena (it's a type of food) bins were empty - completely empty. So, I went back to the feed storage area and went to get some layena - and was assaulted by at least twenty roaches of varying size! Big fat ones, tiny baby ones, all ugly and all rapidly scurrying about. But I managed to get three buckets of layena to fill up the bins. After all, the chickens couldn't have put the roaches there, could they? So, I went back into the chicken pen and paused outside the doorway of their little house, inside which were the two layena bins. I paused because the entire ceiling and walls of this little house were covered in new and old spider webs displaying a coloful variety of dead things - cockroaches, flies, other spiders. But I bucked up my courage enough to duck inside and bring the buckets in with me. It was then that I spied the collection of about 7 or 8 eggs in the corner under the roost. The chickens like to lay there occasionally instead of in their nests. I ducked down even more and used a long stick to retrieve them, and then I threw them to the chickens. Chickens will eat anything, even their own young, infact I think they see it as sort of a delicasy because the moment I throw one egg, they all scramble towards helter-skelter as if it were the best treat in the world. Also, there was no telling how long the eggs had been there, so it was safer to let the chickens eat them than to bring them into the house and let humans get botulism. So, after all that time in the chicken house, I became complacent. The bins had dirt in them, so I made to pick one bin up and dump it out, but the moment I removed it from the wall, all manner of insects went pell-mell everywhere, but I was more concerned with the big, many-legged, black and grey spider that was very much alive on the wall behind the bin. I don't exactly remember exiting the chicken house, I just remember standing in their little bit of earth staring at the doorway into the house, trying to bolster up my courage again to return into the house. Ten minutes later, I succeeded in quickly ducking into the house, putting the bin to rights, pouring the layena into both bins, and high-tailing it out. The chickens couldn't have been responsible for letting that great big spider live free inside their house to terrorize me, could they? Well then I decided that it was time to return one chicken who had been setting on several eggs for over 8 weeks in a separate enclosure back to the main yard. The eggs weren't going to hatch. So, I picked up the bucket she was in (a three-gallon bucket on its side with a bunch of straw on the bottom made for a good sort of shelter and nest). I tilted it upward carefully so that she fell to the bottom and couldn't make worm's meat out of my fingers, and then quickly entered the main enclosure once more. I gently set her out, nest, eggs, and all, and then she swelled to twice her size and jumped back on the nest, but I shooed her away, after she repeatedly tried to attack me. And then comes the coupe de gras that let me know without a doubt that the chickens were out to get me. There were only two eggs in her now vacated nest. I picked them up and noted how light they were. Indeed, all they contained was a shriveled up yolk that rolled around inside like a baby's rattle. I threw one down to the chickens - and it EXPLODED! Not, eww, a-big-mess-everywhere-exploded, I mean the egg shell exploded on impact just like TNT - splattering egg shell shrapnel in a hemisphere of a radius of at least six feet, peppering my legs with sharp fragments. It even made a bomb-like popping noise when it exploded. I guess the gases inside had built in the heat to a tremendous pressure so that any weakening of the outer shell would act like a trigger. I retreated to a safe distance from the other egg, and threw something at it. It too exploded upon impact like the first. Those sneaky little devils! I can't believe the chickens engineered something like that! I mean I was so close to some sort of injury to my head - I shook the egg beside my ear! It could have exploded then, and lucky for the chickens that it didn't! Well, my word! So, battle scarred and shell-shocked, I returned to the house (the human house) and then made the discovery of the over 60 (I counted) mosquito bites to my legs, excluding the backs of my legs, my arms, my hands, and my neck. Over 60! Those chickens no doubt wanted to have the mosquitos drain me enough to make me pass out from the shock of the egg explosions, and then who knows what they would have done to me! My sister can tend them now, for all I care, I won't go back in there.

"Don't think of yourself as a really ugly person - think of yourself as a really pretty monkey."

Taking the Mickey out of Becca

My sister recently returned home after six weeks at Governor's School which took place at Meredith, in Raleigh. While she was there, she found herself in the company of several students who she had made friends with the summer prior at Summer Ventures. Among those people was one very special person (to her) - the one she's liked since Summer Ventures: Jacob. Through the course of the past six weeks, she found out that they've both liked each other since last summer and were too shy to tell each other. Well, now they know and they are currently in that inbetween stage - between friend and friendlier. They aren't exactly boyfriend and girlfriend, but they're heading in that general direction. He's a good kid (kid, ha! He's 17!) and he's well-mannered, smart, good-looking (in a geeky-sort-of way), and mature. The reason I am telling you all about this is because for the past six weeks I and a little before, I have been milking all of the embarrassment out of Becca that I can. She is so funny! Mention his name, and then she gets all quiet and this silly grin spreads across her features. Mention his name like I do (intentionally confusing it with Joseph or Jason) and she goes all red and babbles incoherently. I'm am having so much fun! See, she's never really liked anyone that I could tease her about. Me, on the other hand, I've been teased to no end about Sean Bean and Johnny Depp. (But none of it has weakened my devotion to either of them). Now, I have excellent fodder for her embarrassment. I can't wait until Kim's Bridal Shower, because I hope that Kim teases Becca just as much (and maybe more) than I have. I'm not being mean, or going out of my way to torment my little sister. I only tease those that I love, and what I do is nothing compared to my Mom - you should see her take the mickey! Ah! She just came in the door, time to get back to work!

(PS - Taking the mickey means taking the piss or teasing someone)

Apple Crisp

I just made the best apple dessert that I have ever tasted. I don't mean to brag (well, only a little), but it was good. So, I thought that I'd share the recipe. Since I have combined several recipes and substituted several things and added others, I think it's fair to call it:

Jessica's Apple Crisp

4-6 cups peeled and sliced apples (I used homegrown crabapples, but anything with a bit of tartness, like a granny smith)
1/3 cup brown sugar (light or dark, no biggie)
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/8 tsp nutmeg
3 tbsp cornstarch
2 tbsp lemon juice

Peel and slice the apples into chunks about thumb-size. Place the sliced apples in a bowl and toss with the lemon juice. In another bowl, combine the cornstarch, brown sugar, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Pour this dry mixture into the apples and mix thoroughly. Pour the apples into a 8-9" square glass baking pan. Set aside.

For the crisp:

1/2 cup flour
2/3 cup oats
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup butter

Combine all of the above ingredients, mashing the butter into the dry stuff with a fork, until the mixture resembles pea-sized clumps. Pour this on top of the apples in the baking dish and pat it down flat, so that it covers the apples. Bake in a 350 degree F oven for 35-40 minutes. Let it cool about half an hour (the idea is to serve it warm) and then serve. Serves about 6.

If you try it and don't like it, that's your problem. I loved it, and my family loved it.