"I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself..."

But I am not a wild thing. Most of the time. No comment. Moving on. I have two major exams this week. Guess what! I'm already stressing about them. Genetics is going to be pretty straight forward, but I still have a J-Lo-ass-sized amount(thanks for that one, Callie) of practice work to complete before I can let the subject rest. And then on Thursday, I have Chemistry, and if you would please, just shoot me now. I've gotten about three quarters of the problems done, but that still leaves quite a few hours more - and then there's all the extra reading and definitions that I have to get down. So, really, just shoot me now. I thank God that I won't have anymore exams back to back for the rest of the semester, until finals week in May. Now that I think about it, though, I do prefer math based courses to conceptual courses - my brain is just oriented that way.

Which brings me to my newly decided goal in life: in true college-student fashion, I am going to put my Biological Sciences Degree with a Minor in Spanish to good use when I open my own Theatre and Bookstore. Maybe they'll be together - I'm not sure. Actually, it could be a dollar theatre that is connected to my book store - and the books will be all for sale and all for rent - you can rent it for a small fee (or maybe for free) and if you like it, just keep it and I'll bill you for it later. What do you think? It combines my love of Movies and Literature. Maybe when I get established, I can expand to a bookstore, theatre, and filmstore. Every day I'll play a different movie, and I'll take requests, and I'll charge maybe two dollars (something cheap) for admission, and popcorn and refreshments will be cheap - not the ridiculous prices that current movie theatres charge. And I will sell movie posters - because I love movie posters. So, my establishment will be a sort of entertainment hub - except music. I don't know much about music. Maybe I'll have a small section devoted to film and musical soundtracks. I already collect soundtracks. I have about thirty of them loaded onto my computer. Hmmm. An interesting thought. Music, Movies, Books, and Cinema. And I'd get to design all the decor and color schemes and everything! But I'm getting ahead of myself - first I have to establish some principal first, which means I have to get my degree and get some sort of job for a bit, which means I have to pass my two tests this week, which means I have to study. Damnit.

A weekend in review

Oiy. What a weekend. What did I do? Surprisingly, a lot, which means that the weekend was worth something. Had I not accomplished anything, I could have very well went home (where I would have been much happier). Yesterday, I read for my sociology class, and then I studied three of the five genetic chapters I have to know by Wednesday. Today, I studied one of the two chemistry chapters I have to know by Thursday. It really doesn't sound like much, but now that I see how much time it took me to finish that much, I'm glad I got an early start. Had I not done this much this weekend, I would have been completely stressed out this week - and it's too early in the semester to be that stressed. I started chapter two of chemistry, but a multitude of factors caused me to give that up for the night and to seek solace where I could, which I did. My only problem now is that I essentially have one and a half days to finish studying for both classes - my schedule is very full on both Monday and Wednesday. That leaves Tuesday for me to finish studying and to take care of the ton of homework I am sure to have. Like I said, Oiy. I can't wait to go home this weekend. I'm going through withdrawals of everything I miss from home. Oiy.

New Feature: Quote of the day

Sunday: "Fuck! It's freezing!" --Love Actually

Monday: "Dost thou not suspect my place? Dost thou not suspect my years?! O that he were here to write me down an ass. But masters, remember that I am an ass: though it be not written down, yet forget not that I am an ass. " --Much Ado About Nothing

Tuesday: "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent." -- Eleanor Roosevelt, as quoted in The Princess Diaries

Wednesday: "Mail time! Here's the mail, it never fails, it makes me wanna wag my tail, when it comes I wanna wail: Mail!" --Blues Clues

Thursday: "William Wallace is seven feet tall!" "Yes, I've heard. He kills men by the hundreds, and if he were here, he'd consume the English with fire balls from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his arse!" --Braveheart

Friday: "And I think it's gonna be a long long time Till touch down brings me round again to find I'm not the man they think I am at home Oh no no no I'm a rocket man..." Elton John, Rocketman

Saturday: "Where would we all be without our unhappy childhoods?" --Running with Scissors

Running with Scissors

I've just returned from watching Running with Scissors. Actually, I've just returned from the store with my Chef Boyardee lasagna and skittles (taste the rainbow). Prior to going to the store, I had just finished watching Running with Scissors. My first and last thought on this movie, "What the hell????"

And now the in between thoughts: You may have to be psychoanalyzed after watching this film. I can't believe how depressed and out of sorts I feel from watching this movie - and yet the movie had some very, very, very funny parts. Laugh-so-hard-you-snort (I swear someone did) kind of funny parts. But, more than anything, this movie made me feel so frustrated. I wanted to physically shake some sense into all of the featured characters.

You're probably wondering what the story is. It is the autobiography of this man named Augusten, whose parents are Annete Benning and Alec Baldwin. From a very early age, his mother both babied him and treated him as her equal (which is not saying much). She was an aspiring writer (oh, puh-lease!), who would call her eight-year-old son's school and say that he wouldn't be attending today because he had "over-shampooed his hair and because he had to help mommy get ready for a party." Flash forward a bit, and his parents are on the verge of a divorce, a point which was probably reached with much help from mom's narcissistic, overly-dramatic, and hysterical ways that both castrate and isolate her husband, and dad's quiet, drunkenly disinterest in both his son and his wife.

They go see a shrink, who is to say the least, unorthodox. He first comes to their house, and after asking mom if she has sex with her husband (yes), does she enjoy it (no), does she have thoughts of suicide (yes), how often (after having sex with her husband). And then the good doctor Finch hands mom a Valium - the first pill of a literal torrent of brain-supressing mind-numbing medications. Flash forward, and Finch has lost his practice because he couldn't pay for the building, but he still sees the few patients he's retained at his home - a vibrant pink and crumbling southern mansion, jam-packed with junk, refuse, and other unmentionables.

Mom has her session there, and then tells her son that he is staying there. She never tells him how long he's going to stay, but eventually Finch adopts Augusten. Augusten fits right in with Finch's two daughters and his estranged, gay son. Seriously, they have enough psychological problems to keep the folks at Brenn Marr occupied until the next apocalypse. Moving on, Augusten lives in the crumbling mansion, getting sucked further and further into this wacky family, while his mother is in and out visiting the doctor - and every time we see mom, she looks worse. Augusten, who is gay, forms a relationship with Finch's estranged son, which leads to many complications later on, but where would any of us be without our unhappy childhoods? Dad's been out of the picture now for a while, and hasn't tried to contact his son, and even hung up the phone on his son's emergency call.

This movie is so twisted I can't even keep the story semi-straight - it wan't straight to begin with. Mom slips further and further into craziness, is committed for observation, released, and then decides to take all of her dining/cooking/silver wear and line it all up on the back lawn so it can be purified by the night. You never know if she gets better, but you do get to see Augusten escape, just before the credits roll in and let you know that the story was true and really happened to the real-life Augusten. Are you confused? Good, me too. And now, I've got homework to do.

It's all in my head

Do you know what one of the most depressing things for me is? It's waking up on a day like today - by myself, no friends or family around me, and getting out of bed and logging on to my computer, and then I check my mail. "You have no new messages." I think it's a combination of several things - me being alone, which triggers a rapid downswing in my emotions to where I just feel really down, which could be early stages of bi-polar disorder (a joke! although it does run in my family), and then after being alone and down, calling home to only get the answering machine (where are they anyway?), and then checking my mail in the hopes that someone extended the reach of written contact to me, but I have no new messages. Doesn't anyone love me? I'm kidding! People have lives, I definitely understand that. So, feeling all down, I went and took a shower. When I came back, I had one new email message! It was an author's reply to my review of her online story (on fanfiction.net). That, for some reason, produced a dramatic change in my psychological state - I was happy. Maybe I am really crazy. I must be, because I'm going to end this post to go and study some genetics.

Some George Carlin for ya...

And now people are talking about plant abuse! But it’s not physical abuse, like coming home and kicking over a bunch of zinnias, or urinating in a ficus. No, it’s psychological abuse …for instance…Hanging plants…how do we know they aren't scared shitless? No wonder ivy clings!

I'd insult you, but...

It looks like God beat me to it!

Flushed Away

I have just got back from seeing Dreamworks' Flushed Away, starring the vocal talents of Hugh Jackman, Kate Winslet, Sir Ian McKellan, Jean Reno, Bill Nighy, Andy Serkis, and others. First of all let me say...this movie was hilarious! There were so many moments where the humor was just so...so awesome, so clever (in a strictly non-clever way), and so mean! The film takes place in London, so it's needless to say that they are not very nice to the French.

Le Frog: To action!
Henchfrogs: We surrender!
Le Frog: Not that action, you idiots! The kung-fu thing!

The film is just under one and a half hours, and as I've said, is full of laughs. Two thumbs way way up...

Jueves

So, it was a normal Thursday. It began with my genetics problem session, where I watched my TA, Yi, completely butcher the English language (bless his heart, he's from China and probably two hundred times as smart as I will ever be, but he simply cannot speak English in a manner that allows other people to understand him) as he explained to us how to complete a pedigree for a simple Mendelian autosomal recessive trait. While he was explaining how to get started, I finished the problem and then half an hour later, Yi finished explaining the problem, and people still had the deer in the head lights look. I got it right, so that's one less thing I'll have to study for my genetics test next week, which I'm already beginning to hate.

Well, I think I'd hate anything that would prevent me from going home for the weekend. I like home. It's something I look forward to more than anything else. And yet this weekend I will regrettably be studying genetics and quantitative chemistry until my brain goes on strike. Actually, I think it already has, but that's no big surprise. So, after genetics, I went to self defense, where we learned blocking techniques, and I unlearned my left from my right. I thought I had it down, but left from right or right from left is a very tricksy distinction for me.

And then on to Chemistry, where I learned that my professor is an avid hater of the NY Yankees, and has said he will penalize anyone who shows up to the test next week with a Yankees hat. I'm tempted to find a Yankees T-shirt and wear it just to say that he only extended the ban to hats and left all other paraphernalia as fair game. But I won't, I'm fond of not being a pretentious little snot. And then it was back to my room for some procrastinating. I did some recreational reading, and then I bought a few books online (I wanted something of Edmond Rostand's). And yet I am still procrastinating. I think I'm going to grit my teeth and do my homework now, so, cíao.

Joke

Why do bird fly upside down over North Dakota?
--Because it's not worth a shit!

Ow

What a beautiful Wednesday! It's a great day, so go enjoy it. That said, all the punching I did yesterday has left every muscle from the middle of my back all the way to my wrists in agony. Well, agony may be a bit strong, but they hurt! And I get to do it all again tomorrow! Today is going to last forever. First, I have my two morning classes, in one of which I have a 'mini' test. I didn't make up the name, but I have to take it. Then, I have my once-a-week class, and then I have my chemistry lab. I will be in class until sometime after six. Ug. But after that, it's all down hill, until the weekend, when I start studying for my two real, big exams next week. Fabulous. Thursday night of next week will truly be all downhill, and I can't wait! Ick, class beckons, ciao.

The old one-two

Self defense today rocked. We went back over the six different weapons your hand could be, and then we got to hit each other. We used matting, of course, to soften the blows, but we got to punch each other. I paired off with this very tiny girl - very nice - but very small. She probably only came up to my shoulder, if that. I'm 5'7", or 5'8" according to my parents this past weekend (I was standing next to my mom who is 5'8" and everyone one couldn't believe that I was as tall if not taller than she was). This girl may have been 5'0", if that. So, I was somewhat hesitant to punch the mat, but I did. We practiced defensive posturing, and then how to strike with our lead fist, and then do a quick reverse punch, the old 1-2. And then two strikes with our lead to the head and a reverse punch to the chest. And then a 1-2 and then a back hand to the chest. It was fun. I feel somewhat strong, although my first two knuckles on either hand aren't going to forgive me anytime soon.

Blue Monday

Well, it wasn't all that bad. I managed to accomplish a lot. I went to class - Genetics and then Sociology of Medicine. And then I came back to my room, did some homework and reading, and then it was off to the library to meet with two of my 'tutees.' The two that I met today are the type of students that make me look bad. They are on the ball, always working, always studying. Me? Nope. Well, actually, today I did. After I finished meeting with my tutees, I did some reading for genetics, and then some reading for chemistry, and then I worked a bunch of problems for chemistry, and then I completed my pre-lab assignment for my chemistry lab. That's a lot, for me. I am a slacker, I'm not even going to sugarcoat it - I'm a slacker. I don't like reading for a class, or doing homework, or studying. But I do it, occasionally. And I succeed, oddly enough. That's why I say I'm lucky - there's no other explanation for how well I do in school - I don't work any harder than anyone else. Enough! Now, I'm going to drift off to sleep while listening to Medical Incredible.

So What?!

I'm sitting here in my eclectic conglomeration of clothing, and every time Callie looks at me, she can't help but laugh at me. Why? Picture this: I am wearing green silky pajama pants, a well-worn (some would say ratty, I prefer holy) quicksilver long sleeve tee, two layers of socks (black socks always leave lint between my toesies, so I wear a pair of white ankle socks under them), and I have my hair tucked up into my new toboggan. Is that so weird? Apparently so. Callie says I look like such a homeless person, and truth be told, I can see where she is coming from, but hey - comfort it comfort. Call it by another name and it will still feel as sweet.... See! She just walked by me and said, "You are so homeless right now!"

Just to show that people don't really change...

When my Dad and I stopped in Kinston for a snack and a drink, he got coffee, and I, although I was shivering as I walked into the store, got a parrot ice slushee. I can't help myself! I almost always go for the frozen drink. I love frozen drinks. That's half the reason why when I am 21, I will be the margarita queen. The other half of the reason is that I love limes. I'd eat limes and lemons like other people eat apples if the actual eating of the limes and lemons didn't eat away my teeth enamel. Oh well.

Sunday

A day named after the sun, and yet I have yet to see the sun today. That probably has something to with the icy cold rain that's been falling here in Raleigh for um, I don't know, the ENTIRE day. Oh well. Let's see, this morning I woke up (was woken up) just before ten for breakfast, my very favorite meal of the day. Oh, if only you could hear the sarcasm that drips from those words. I really really don't like breakfast. I can stomach breakfast foods every now and then - once a week or less is my preference. I blame my dining hall. Every morning when I went for breakfast, they would have the same thing every few days: pancakes, soggy french toast, blueberry pancakes, soggy Texas french toast, and then always the same sides: grits, biscuits, gravy, paper-thin and greasy bacon or ham, and sometimes sausage links. Monotony is not a friend of mine, and thus I do not particularly warm to breakfast, especially just after I wake up. So this morning, I could smell something cooking in the kitchen, and to my everlasting dismay, my Dad was fixing sausage gravy and biscuits, hash browns, and scrambled eggs. I am not a fan a biscuits and gravy - probably because I've had it one too many times. The hash browns were fine - a little salt, some ketchup, and voila. The scrambled eggs violated several of my rules about eggs. First of all, if I have to eat eggs, I prefer them fried, with runny insides, with grits. Note: I said grits, not rice or anything else. You rice shippers can go to...well, let me just say that I don't get you or your eating habits. Second, if we are not having grits, then the only other way that I like my eggs is with a bunch of cheese mixed into the eggs before they hit the pan, with a lot of cayenne pepper, maybe some garlic, and some salt. The cheese is essential - without the cheese, I'll have skips for breakfast thank you very much. The scrambled eggs this morning were made without cheese. I couldn't make myself eat them. Like I said, I am not much of a breakfast-food person. If I woke up to a steaming bowl of chili, or a chicken quesadilla, or some spaghetti - I'd be a happy camper. Maybe french toast with boysenberry syrup every now and then. OK, enough about breakfast. After breakfast, I updated spy bot on my parents' computer, and then I checked the weather for Raleigh - icy sleet and rain. Lovely. So my Dad and I left a tiny bit earlier than we'd intended (I didn't want him driving home after dark in icy conditions). That leaves me here, in Raleigh, and for the first hour or so after I got here, my Internet refused to work. It works now, but when it didn't, I felt so lost. I depend on the Internet for so much - notification about my classes, email, appointments, current weather reports, TV schedules, dining hall menus, not to mention constant updates on movie and harry potter news. But, the dark time is over, and I am going to dive into some homework, maybe, after I make some ramen noodles. And no, I haven't said anything about Saturday, but let me say that it was a very very good day. Later.

Whose Line Is It Anyway?

During the skit Greatest hits, Ryan and Colin were narrating a compilation album of songs of the motorcycle. Ryan introed with, "Hi! We won't tell you what you're already watching, so we won't tell you what program we're going to return you to." And then Colin says, without batting a lash, "It's animal porn." To say that everyone was thrown off and speechless would be an understatement. Even Colin was embarrassed, and Ryan, who is without a doubt the dirtiest-minded one there, was stunned speechless. God, I love that show!

Home for the weekend

And then back to school on Sunday. The cycle never ends. I don't know what it is about coming home, but every time I come home from Raleigh, I get this huge headache that literally makes my entire head throb. Maybe it's getting used to the different allergens in Newport vs. Raleigh, or maybe it's knowing that the brief respite will be over all too soon. I don't know, I just know that two Tylenol and an hour usually make it go away. I'm rather proud of myself today. I managed to set up meetings with all of the people that I will be tutoring in organic chemistry this semester. I have three "tutees" (is that not the most ridiculous title you've ever heard?) for this semester, and I must meet with each one for a minimum of one hour and a maximum of two hours per week. And I get paid! It may be minimum wage, and it may only be three hours a week, but it's more than I'm making now. Anyway, I'm glad to be home. The only thing that would make me happier would be if it were Saturday right now. Anyway (I've said that already, haven't I), I'm off for a shower and then some What Not To Wear on TLC. Bon nuit.

Birthday Wishes

Just in case anyone is in doubt, the wish that you make just before you blow out your candles on your birthday cake DOES come true. It did for me last year. I made my birthday wish, and two and a half weeks later, it came true. See, is that not proof enough?

There is a God...

And He loves me! Ha HA!! It's snowed! I didn't think I was going to get to see snow this year, but I was wrong. I love snow. I don't care what anyone says to the contrary - it's beautiful and fun. I know it's cold, I know it's wet, I know it's potentially lethal...but I still love it. (I'm a very forgiving person). Both mine and Callie's alarms went off at 8:45 this morning. Callie promptly sat up and set her alarm again, and then laid back down. I, however, got up and logged on to my computer. After checking my email (none, doesn't anybody love me????) I looked at the little desktop weather icon on my desktop. Looking at the 600mi radar, I noticed that the line between the pink and the white was just below Raleigh, with Raleigh in the white. Could it be? I then leaped up onto my bed, ran across my bed to the window and opened one of the blinds. It could be! It was! It snowed! Callie was soon woken up by me saying, "Callie! Holy shit! Callie!" She was excited too. The only downside it that classes are NOT canceled. That means I have to go to my two before-noon classes in this heavy cold. That means I have to get myself dressed an out the door in less than an hour. And I'm supposed to dress out for PE - I think I'm wearing the sweats today. Brrrr.

Smooth-er Sailing

I dropped my botany course yesterday which means that my course load just became significantly more manageable. Not easy - manageable. Tomorrow is my busiest day - I should be in class until after seven. My first ever Quantitative Chemistry Lab, woohoo! I've always had a huge fear of regular chemistry, and the practical side of it scares me the most. What scares me? I'm afraid that I just won't get it. End of story, no need to psych myself out any more. Right now, I'm going to finish my kool-aid and eat my orange (must keep that immune system fully locked and loaded). I love citrus!

What show uses the most toilet paper?

Jeopardy! (Hum the tune)

Golden Globes

They sneaked up on me this year! Oh well. I normally keep up with all of the very hot men in hollywood, which usually keeps me up to date on current hollywood and red carpet news. But I've just realized that I haven't taken a second and sometimes not even a first look at my usual stache of male stars. Wow. One year ago, I was rabid over Johnny Depp and I was furious that Sean Bean didn't get a single nomination. This year, I have no idea and I'm barely even mildly interested. What has come over me? I have two large Johnny Depp posters on my wall and about thirty random pictures of Sean Bean, Russell Crowe, Johnny Depp, Karl Urban, Martin Henderson, and selected others. I don't think I have even looked at them since October. I'm just not that interested in them.

And now, since I haven't really paid that much attention this past year, I'm just going to pick my favorites for a select few categories.

Best Motion Picture - Drama: Babel
Best Motion Picture - Musical or Comedy: Little Miss Sunshine
Best Actor - Drama: Will Smith - The Pursuit of Happyness
Best Actor - Musical or Comedy: Johnny Depp - Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
Best Actress - Drama: Kate Winslet - Little Children
Best Actress - Musical or Comedy: Renee Zellweger - Miss Potter
Best Supporting Actor: Brad Pitt - Babel
Best Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett - Notes on a Scandal
Best Director: Clint Eastwood - Flags of Our Fathers

Wonderful, Wonderful! Oh so wonderful...

Hmm. I guess it would be quite normal for me to say that my weekend was the highpoint of my week. I mean, normally, the weekend includes a brief time of freedom - no work or no class or a free evening every now and then, so why wouldn't it be the highpoint? Well, normal or not, this weekend was the highlight of my week, fortnight, month, take your pick, end of story. Maybe it was being able to get a decent night's sleep, or walking along the waterfront in Beaufort, or collecting shells along Atlantic Beach this morning, but it was fun, relaxing, and perfect. Now, I'm just a little sunburnt, a little windburnt, but also the proud owner of a hundred or more semi-odd but very beautiful sea shells. Have I mentioned that I am addicted to collecting sea shells? In the distant future, when I have a home of my own, I'll have guests over and I'll show them all the rooms and I can just imagine them saying, "Oh, so you decorated this room with sea shells too, just like the last one, and the one before that, and the one before that, and the one before that..." Oh well. Well, no, it probably won't be like that. What they'll probably notice first is my choice of colors. Neutrals? Not in my house, no way. There's too many neutrals in this house, so in my home, I'm going all out with tasteful merlots and burgundies, tropical mangoes and kiwis, aquatic blues and greens, and so on and so forth. I like color. You see, I've got the home front and part of the family-life planned out for my future, it's just the job and the location and other useful details that are completely blurred out. Details, bah, who needs them anyway? So, back to my wonderful weekend, it was precisely that: wonderful. And yet, by this time tomorrow, I should be back in dank old Raleigh, getting ready for another week of classes, this time with labs. So, I'm going to go wash some shells and act as an artistic consultant to my Mom and my sister as they plan and sew and decorate some pillows.

Puta Madre

No, I will not translate that. Figure it out for yourself - I'll even give you a hint - it's profanity. Any how, let's talk about Jessica's day. Jessica woke up about a minute after her alarm started shrieking. I say a minute because when it first sounded, Jessica had no idea of what it was and was therefore unconcerned and immovable. And then a minute later, when the noise refused to cease, Jessica sprang out of bed at the same instant that realization stuck her. Then she checked her email, changed into some warm clothes and shoes, drank some hot chocolate, and went to class. Class was uneventful. What did she do? She took notes and listened. Then, Jessica went to Lil' Dinos and bought a sub to share with her Dad on the way home, and then returned to her dorm room, packed the rest of her things, and went downstairs to meet her dad. The trip home was uneventful. Jessica doesn't remember talking much at all simply because she felt the beginnings of a big headache and exhaustion simultaneously making their respective presences known. Jessica then went to the bank with her dad, endorsed her tuition refund check, and then went to the commissary to pick up some groceries, and then went home. Five minutes after arriving at home, she unpacked all of her dirty clothes and put them into the wash, and then she sat down on her bed fully intent on digesting thirty pages of genetics text book. Two hours later, she emerged to finish her laundry and to cook dinner. Dinner consisted of cooking some ground turkey, adding some onions, banana peppers, and fresh jalapenos, and then one yellow squash, one zucchini, and a few potatoes followed by some turkey sausage. Surprisingly, it was a success, which she already knew it would be because she has made the same dish in the same manner several times already. After eating dinner, Jessica returned to her laundry and washed her bedding, for no other reason than to bleed on them later. I'll get to that momentarily. Jessica then spent an extremely long hour waiting until nine so she could make a very important phone call, and when she finally was able to talk to the person she wished to speak with, her nose started bleeding. It was for this reason, and this reason alone, that she is thankful that the call was short, so she could calmly rush to the bathroom to try and stem the bleeding. Jessica has had several nosebleeds in the past, but she wishes me to tell you that this one was a real gusher, the like of which sent shivers down her hypochondriac spine. Thankfully, the aforementioned gusher has subsided, and now Jessica is sitting here, talking in third person whilst making this post. Isn't that fabulous? I didn't think so. And now Jessica is going to let the cat out (literally - he's clawing at the door) and then she is going to watch some TV and then take a shower, and then fall asleep or go to bed, whichever happens to occur first. Pleasant dreams.

The Prestige

I just got back from watching The Prestige, starring Christian Bale, Hugh Jackman, and Michael Caine, to name a few. I have two words: Oh my. Really, just before the credits rolled in over the final scene, I had to just stop and say, "Oh my." Oh my. I'm not sure if you would call it a twist, but it's in there. Pretty darn cool in my opinion. I kinda figured it out - kinda - but the movie was still very entertaining, even if it was very dark, and another character was named Jessica. Ick. Any how - I enjoyed it. Except for the parts with electricity and Tesla - then I just wanted to sit as far back in my seat as possible.

Pardon my French and my wordiness; I need to vent

I've just had my second day of classes, and I feel very much like cussing right now. I had a good morning, with my Genetics Problem Session and Self Defense, and then I jumped into Quantitative Chemistry, which is going to be a hell of a lot, and then I went to Special Topics in Plant Evolution, and I said, "What the fuck?" Let me explain something about me: I am somewhat smart, and I am somewhat hardworking, but I absolutely abhor reading from text books, busy work, and writing. I was most looking forward to this class because I like evolution and learning about history, but I mean, come on, do I get time to breathe? The workload is ridiculous. I am already considering (heavily leaning towards) dropping the course. It's not required - it's a free elective. I hate writing, and yet - I will have a paper due at the start of almost every class, plus a huge term paper, and summarizations of these long-ass movies we have to watch on our own time. If I drop the class, however, I will only be taking 13 hours. The minimum courseload required to be considered a full time student is 12, so I'd still be full time, but I've never taken so few hours. I've always almost maxed out (with the exception of last semester). It's my decision, and it wouldn't hurt me in the long run, considering I have two semesters after this to spread four major classes and one minor class across. But, when I make this decision, it's going to be hard to convince my parents that it is in no way related to me wishing to slack off or to me wishing to devote my time to someone who is not school-related, although those two things are very urgent desires of mine. Let me plan my argument.

I wish to drop BO 295E for the following reasons:
1. My other courses are extremely demanding with mandatory reading (I have to read to keep up and to understand things). I will have almost too much work as it is without Botany.
2. Of all my courses, this is the only one that is not required of me, with the exception of my tutoring course, and therefore is expendable
3. Of all my courses, this one has the most work required of me
4. Of my expendable courses, tutoring actually pays money, and botany doesn't
5. Tutoring is going to require a minimum of three and a maximum of six hours a week outside of class, so in effect, it is like taking a three or four credit hour class, and therefore, even though my schedule might show thirteen hours, my schedule will at least be fifteen hours, if not more.
6. It is the second day of school, and already I feel like giving up everything (I've felt this way before, but it usually occurs around final exam week). By giving up one class, I can restore some order and sanity to my academic life. Seriously, I want to scream/cry/cuss right now, although it wouldn't do me any good.

But on the flip side, I have several reasons to keep taking BO 295E
1. Dr. Thakor, my professor, was also my advisor for my first two years here. She knows me, and is just tickled that I am taking another one of her classes. If I leave, I might (to put it lamely) hurt her feelings, which is also taking into account that there are only thirteen students in the class, so if I leave, there will only be twelve.
2. I was originally going to take this heavy of a course load when I went to register, but I couldn't get into Human Anatomy, so I took both sociology of medicine and botany to keep my credit hours up. I am actually taking less hours currently, at 16, than I originally intended to take. And now I want to take even less.

Hmmm, decisions decisions. I hate making decisions. Don't ask me what I want to do with my future, or even what I want for dinner. I don't know, and I'll probably take forever to decide. But not for this class - my deadline is Sunday. That leaves me enough time if I decide to continue to with the class to finish the paper and the reading assignment due on Tuesday.

So, I didn't cuss as much as I thought I would. Damn. But, I did get as verbose as I normally do when I'm nervous, worried, and slightly depressed, as I am now. Now, on to my extensive homework in other classes, and then a dollar movie at the campus cinema at 9:30. Tomorrow, I'm going home! I should be home around four or so, and I can't wait!

Discouragement Abounds

I have never felt more overwhelmed on my first day of class than I do today. I had Genetics, Sociology of Medicine, and Introduction to Collegiate Tutoring. Genetics looks as if it will kick my behind in a big way. No, really. I've read over eighty pages of material today, and I'm not even finished. I still have reading to start for my other two classes. Now, I'm going to relax and watch a movie because if I read anymore, my head will explode and my eyes will burst into flame.

Vacation is officially ended

I think you've probably already picked up on the hint that I'm not exactly jumping for joy to be back at school. And to top it all off, my roommate is putting me to shame by having spent that last several hours getting all of her folders organized and syllabi printed. Me? I grabbed several spiral notebooks and some text books, threw them into my bag along with some pens that work and T.H. White's The Once and Future King, and I was good to go in less than five minutes. Ick. All right, enough complaining from me. I am incredibly happy right now, so I am going to sign off for the night and go bask in the glow of my happiness. Bon nuit.

Hooray!

Callie's back! I had the room door open, and then a voice from the hallway rang out with, "What's up, Bitches?" I knew that my fabulous roommate had returned. I managed to shock her once with a tale from my vacation, and she managed to shock me once by asking me if I had lost weight because she thought I looked a bit thinner. No, but hey, it made me feel great. And the temperature outside is steadily dropping, which we both noticed as we unloaded her car, and which we will notice again when we go outside to walk to the dining hall. Brrrr.

My Apologies

My Blog has been out of commission for most of the day, but thankfully it is up and running now. I just took a walk around campus - still as beautiful as when I left it. In fact, it is much more beautiful because of all the flowering Japanese Apricot trees and their beautiful, delicate, pink blossoms floating like clouds all over the brickyard. Anyway, now I need to get my school stuff in order, but first I'm going to go and get some cough drops because adjusting to Raleigh and to the sudden drop in temperature has got my sinuses going haywire. Achoo.

One day down, four to go.

Let's face it, I just don't want to be back at school. Being alone back at school just makes it worse, so I'm very grateful that that will end tomorrow. Right now, I'm practically starved for human communication. What did I do today? Nothing of significance. I caught up on some sleep, and then the productivity of my day took a rapid downhill slump. I managed to fill in the calendar on the wall, rearrange some fridge magnets (I got this refrigerator poetry set for Christmas and I've been trying to come up with derogatory and dirty sentences) and redo the door decorations. Not that much, I realize. I wish I had brought a puzzle with me, something that I could do with my hands. At home I managed to stay busy - I cooked some good food. One night, I made a focaccia white bread chicken pizza - I made the focaccia bread from scratch, and then came up with my own unique blend of spices to mix in with the chicken and the cheese. Surprisingly, it turned out very well. And then on Friday, I made chicken parmesean on a bed of fettecine alfredo, with fresh french bread and bruschetta (all homemade). I'd rather be cooking there than sitting here, writing on this blog and watching full house. Actually, I can think of other places I'd really rather be. Boo hiss. Good night.

And I'm Back

At school. Lovely, lovely school. Ick. But, on the bright side, I have my lovely black, flat-screen monitor, gateway computer back, as well as my T-1 internet connection, and my favorite bed spread, and unlimited hot water for long showers. But, on the flip side, I'm at school. Ick. Which means I'm not at home. I can't be with my family or anyone else I may have become attached to over the break. Double ick. And, Callie won't be coming back to stay until Tuesday, so I'm basically on my own until then. But then again, I get sole-possession of the remote control, and I can watch Robin Hood: Men in Tights as often as I want. Is it too early to start a count down until Friday? Classes don't even start until Wednesday, and then I don't have any labs this week - so it's a very easy week. And I found out that my Mom gets Monday off as well, so she can take me back to school then, and we can all enjoy a three day weekend! God, my room is freezing! Why can't they turn up the heat a little? I've not stop shivering ever since I got out of the shower. Oh bother it. Back to Much Ado About Nothing.

(My favorite part recalled from memory, so please, forgive the mistakes)

Beatrice-I wonder you should still be talking, Signior Benedick, nobody marks you
Benedick-My dear lady disdain, are you yet living?
Beatrice-Is't possible disdain should die when she has such meet food to feed it as Signior Benedick? Courtesy itself must convert to disdain if you come in her presence.
Benedick-Then is courtesy a turncoat and I would confess that I am loved of all women, only thyself excepted, and I would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard heart, for truly, I love none
Beatrice-A dear happiness to women. They would else have been troubled with a pernicious suitor. I thank god and my cold blood I am of your mind for that. I would rather hear my dog bark at a crow than hear a man swears he love me.
Benedick-God keep your ladyship in that humor 'lest some man escape a predestinate scratched face
Beatrice-Scratching could not make it worse an 'twere such a face as yours
Benedick-Oh, you are a rare parrot teacher
Beatrice-A bird of my tongue is better than a beast of yours
Benedick-I would my horse had the speed of your tongue and so a good continuer

All's well that ends well

And what a glorious end to my vacation! What a night! Why do nights have to end? Why does the Earth have to rotate continuously, bringing dawn and a new day nearer and nearer? Oh well. At least I get to come home on Friday! I have a three-day weekend next week, but, I may not get to enjoy it simply because with both of my parents working now, I have no ride back to school on Monday, only on Sunday. Damn. Tomorrow, well, today for all intents and purposes, I will be riding back to Raleigh, unloading my stuff into my room, walking to the bookstore to spend half a grand (you think I'm joking?!?) on text books that I probably won't read, and then lugging them back to my room, bidding goodbye to my family, and then unpacking as I catch up with my most-fabulous roommate. Dear me, it is late, and I still have to finish packing! But I'm so happy! I don't think I've ever had a better vacation. Sigh. Off I go to finish packing, toodles!

Surprises come in big packages

Sometimes they say that the best things come in little packages. That may be true, unless you are trying to get into a university. In that case, a tiny little envelope usually bears a carefully-worded rejection letter and a large package usually contains all manner of that particular university's paraphernalia as well as an acceptance letter. Rebecca, my younger sister, has only applied to NC State University, my school, because it is the closest school with a meteorology program. She recently received a package from NCSU. A large package. Oh dear, what will my parents do when both of us girls are away at NCSU next year?

Class Ranking

I just received my most current class ranking:

Class Rank effective at the end of FALL '06 Semester
Rank in Class:	1 OF 7647
Rank in School/College:	1 OF 1462
Rank in Dept:	1 OF 425

(-: Be Happy Like Me :-)

Hello

Hello! I know I haven't been posting as much as I usually do. I actually have a life now! I go back to Raleigh on Sunday, so with three full days left of vacation, I'm going to briefly reflect on the entire vacation. Hmmm....ok, reflecting done. Let's call this vacation the bringer of surprises. I've lost things that I never thought I could live without and I've gained very special things that I was always afraid was never meant to happen for me. That's the way my life usually works - in balance. Whenever I have a somewhat good day, it is followed by a somewhat bad day. But when I have an extraordinarily good night, for instance a night at the theater, it is usually followed by an extraordinarily terrible morning. New Year's Eve was a wonderful night, and luckily, nothing bad has followed it. I had a wonderful New Year's Eve, though I know it was the company and not anything else that made it wonderful. I haven't stopped smiling since! Oh do shut up. I'm happy, and that's what counts. There's even a balance in my thoughts. I have three main categories of thoughts: thoughts about Scrappy, thoughts about someone, and thoughts about everything else. Translation: sad thoughts, happy thoughts, and nil thoughts. Balance. Funny that I don't have such good balance even when I walk. I've been working outside all day and every time I loaded up the wheel barrow, I would wobble my way up to the garden mulch pile. Anyway, I've just spent an entire post on ramblings, so now it's time for me to bid thee adieu so I can go and finish cooking dinner. Adieu.

A Night on the Farm

The other day, Rebecca informed us that something had killed and half-eaten one of our hens. Rebecca is the one whose duty it is to feed and take care of the Chickens, and thus she discovered this fallen comrade when she went to feed them. Both Rebecca and Rob had heard the chickens making all sorts of noise the night prior, but they never saw fit to tell my Dad about it until it was too late. Well, Dad wasn't very happy about that.

So, last night, as I was watching Much Ado About Nothing for the umpteenth time since I got it for Christmas, I thought I heard the chickens making some racket. So, I went down to my room (which is closer to the chicken pen and very much quieter than the living room) to listen. Sure enough, I could hear them and from the panicked noises, I deduced that some pest was in there bothering them. So, I hunted around the house for a flashlight, found one, grabbed my shoes and a coat and my keys (in case some idiot younger brother should decide to purposely lock me out of the house again) and quietly slipped outside.

I have never been afraid to venture outside after dark - not in my own yard. But it hit me before I took my third step - I'd never been afraid because I'd always had one of man's best friends to protect me. Indeed, the last time an animal was feeding off of our chickens, Scrappy was the one to charge in and kill it herself, no help needed. But, I pushed that thought aside and sloshed (the ground is very soggy) to the chicken pen. When I got there, I shined the light on the pen and found all of the chickens huddled to one side of the yard, and none in the house on the roost. This was very unusual, so I shined the light in the house and what met me but two glowing orbs of some mammalian predator. It was a possum. I didn't think he was that big (the one Scrappy killed was twice his size!), but he had killed before and might kill again, so I went back into the house and woke my Dad up.

He grabbed a small rifle and we went out to kill ourselves a possum. When we reached the chicken house, the possum was no where inside of it. My Dad and I circled the pen, but there was no sign of the rascally varmit. But we could hear him, and eventually we did find him, scaling the chicken wire at our eye-level. As soon as we shone the light on him, he froze, and it didn't take long for Dad to send him to his maker. After that, we went back into the house. I learned that Dad thought it was a very big possum, (though he couldn't have been more than eighteen inches long minus the tail). Go figure. So, anyway, that was my somewhat exciting night, but it's made me realize again that Scrappy is gone.

I know I keep saying that, but it hasn't sunk in yet. Every time someone goes outside on the porch, I expect to hear the thump-thump greeting of her tail. When I come home, it always takes me a minute to understand why she's not barking to greet me and why she doesn't come running and quivering with excitement when she realizes that it's me. And now I'm getting teary-eyed again. Oh well. I hope everyone had a very Happy New Year, I certainly did.

It's up finally

I promise it's nothing bad. Click here

Happy New Year!