All in a day's work

I am a confirmed procrastinator. That's sounds like an AA meeting: "Hi, my name is Jess, and I am a confirmed procrastinator...." Well, I am. Most of the time. There are times when I surprise myself and manage to get all my work done in advance and surprisingly, that's been my MO this semester. But somewhere along the way, I've managed to backtrack to my delaying ways. In my defense, it's only been this week and then it was only because I've been feeling progressively sicker all week. And now, I'm almost caught up and I am exhausted. Wow, when did this become my personal pity party? I wanted to talk about how accomplished I feel. Yesterday, Callie, my awesome roommate, and her friend Justin were doing their organic chemistry homework here in our room. I was here doing my own homework (shocking, I know!), when several chances arose for me to demonstrate my organic chemistry know-how. I didn't think I was helping so very much, but apparently Justin told Callie that I was a genius (though not to tell me because it might swell my head), and Callie wants to take me to dinner to return the favor. And then tonight, Callie, and our friends Yoohnee and Renee, were all working to finish the same organic chemistry assignment, and I actually felt like I made a difference. A small difference, to be sure, but nonetheless a difference. And now I've been asked several different times if I'm planning on teaching organic chemistry (hadn't thought about it), or if I'm going to start charging for help because I could make a killing (I've actually thought about this one), or how it is I can remember all this stuff from, gasp, a semester ago and if I'm some sort of genius or something (not really). This sounds like a whole bunch of bragging, and it is, but it means more to me than that. It means that I've actually found something that I think that I can do: I can explain and tutor in organic chemistry, and I plan to next semester when I can get a position in the tutorial center. I have no idea what I want to do when I graduate in a year and a half, and time's running out, and all I'm doing is getting more and more nervous. This one small achievement - this being able to do something practical - has acted like a small compass in my sea of uncertainty. Who knows to where it will lead me?