Learn To Be Lonely

Why is it that people are afraid to be alone? Not all people, but a lot of them. They can't go to the bathroom alone, they can't go eat alone, they can't sit alone in class and I want to know... why? Is it some genetic quirk hidden deep in our DNA that makes us instinctively want to flock together? Will loners stand out and perish one by one after living a miserable and solitary existence? Maybe I'm just weird (and believe you me - I'm not the only one who's thought that before), but I like my solitude. I like being by myself - you can see that if you watch me for one day. 99% of the time, I eat alone, walk alone, sit alone, wait alone, and go to the movies alone. Being alone is easy and relaxing. You don't have to keep a conversation going (If you do, you might need to talk to someone about that), you don't have to worry about your appearance or making any foot-in-mouth blunders, and you don't have to worry all those annoying social rules and quirks - letting guys open doors for you, letting guys pay for you, or worrying if you have enough money to cover yourself if it's dutch. However, when placed in a social setting where I am forced to interact..poof...somebody flips a switch and I'm Ms. Congeniality...I can talk to anyone, I take charge, I give orders....and I have no idea where it comes from. In lab the other day, I was partnered with this really sweet but shy man, and I found myself rattling off orders to him ("you have to take the soil out, put the wicks in and then fill the quad up with soil...") . Or, in the same lab, when forced to interact with a group of fellow students to divine a collective answer to several questions, I am the one who breaks the ice and directs discussion. And when talking to my new roommate or her boyfriend, I find it the easiest thing in the world to converse, and jokes and quips just fall from my lips.
So, the weird thing is that I can exist comfortably both ways. But, I prefer the former and not the latter. And yet, twice in my life, people have approached me while I was eating alone, thinking me lonely and pining for a spot of company, and proceeded to sit down and talk to me...and talk to me...and talk to me. I talk back, because, claro, that afore mentioned switch was flipped the moment they sat down. We have a pleasant conversation, getting a glimpse into the each other's very different or very similar lives. But when I tell them that I usually eat alone, that I prefer to eat alone, their eyebrows disappear into their hairlines as their face contorts in incredulity. "Eat alone? No one wants to eat alone! That's just sad!" No, it's not. It's me.