Moral for the day

Perhaps it is better not to want anything; that way you will never taste the bitterness of disappointment.

Oh, and before I forget, I'm temporarily revoking my belief that cardinals grant wishes. This may sound superstitious of me, but no one really cares one way or the other. I made a wish last week, and I knew it was a long shot, but when I saw that cardinal, before I could even finish thinking that, 'hey, I can make a wish,' I'd already made my wish. It was only for something that was incredibly important to me, but I think I knew I wouldn't get it. And I know I sound like a petulant child, whining because I didn't get what I wanted. Or, you can hold the 'like;' I am a petulant child. I knew it wouldn't happen, but I wished for it anyway. I managed to get my hopes up, stupidly, and now I get to wallow for a bit in familiar disappointment. But it was a selfish wish anyway. I could have wished for something more meaningful to everyone. I could have wished for a a peaceful weekend at home. Then perhaps I wouldn't have retreated to my room after half an hour of being home and already in tears because of all the shouting and dirty looks and hurtful words. In a way, I don't want to go home for the summer because I won't stand for any of that anymore. I will not stand for it. Will I accomplish anything? I think so. I've been told that I can't do any good there, but then I remember that I'm twenty and I still live in a land of idealism. Sure, I never have a very large picture for my idealism; I'd rather focus on getting my family to coexist in harmony than fight poverty in Bangladesh. But because I haven't lost that idealism, not all of it at least, I still think I can make a difference. And here I am getting all depressing again. I wrote a post earlier, but I deleted it because it was too dismal; it made me sound overly-cynical and pissed, exactly how I felt when I wrote it, but I didn't want to pass that on to any of you. What's that you say? Oh yes, sorry, too late.